Lost Love

 It was usual day and I was out for shopping with my mother when suddenly my eyes got stuck on him.  I froze for a minute, kept looking at him and regained senses after my mother shook me up. I looked at my mother and again looked at him. Emotion flooded from inside, I found it hard to stand or to stabilize myself, tears were about to roll down my cheeks when I patted myself, shook my legs and held those tears in the eyes , with a deep long breath I answered my mother "yes let's go". 

It was him, the long lost first love of my life. I have been  longing for him all these years. I used to imagine how it would be when I see him again. I used to think whether he would be married or how many kids he would have. All these years I have been holding myself together and promising myself to not break when I see him. But here I am, all shattered and destroyed. 

I walk closer to see more of him. Meanwhile my mother and I having conversation about list of stuff we need to collect from the store. "Yes Maa that's all, we don't need much stuff ". All this while staring him. I walk closer to see a woman standing by his side. And suddenly a cute little girl came running from nowhere and hold pulls his trousers saying, "Dad I want those chocolates". And as I go closer I hear his voice after decades I hear something that soothes my ears. In his voice he replied, "Okay I will get you the chocolates". And then he holds her in his arms getting her the chocolates she asked. 

I am looking at the entire scenario from a distance where he did not see me. I saw the charm in his face, the shine in his eyes out of happiness on holding his daughter. He looks at the woman, his wife with intense eyes filled with love. They had finished their shopping and were leaving when our eyes met. I could not stop staring at him, breathing heavily I looked at his wife, his kids, giving a smirk I looked away and moved towards the shop where my mother was standing.

I held pain for a very long duration. We had parted in good terms and yet I was in continuous distress but no more. As I see him happy and content in his life with beautiful small family I feel relieved. Today I am happy for him and today I feel I can move on in my life too.